**.. 31 days of blogging ..**

One of my New Year's resolutions this year was to blog more.  I have already blogged more in this first month than I did in last year entirely.

I began the year blogging about my grandma and how much I miss her.
We bought a huge tv!
This summer we took pictures for my parents 25th anniversary.
I tried to get people's opinions on social networking and how it affects their lives, but no one responded (woe is me).
I wrote about my crazy semester and all of the studying I have to do.
I let everyone know my feelings about animals and slaughterhouses (one of my better posts (I think)).
My dad had a birthday!
My dad and Jack made a curling rink on our pond and we 'curled'.
I attended a yoga training session this past weekend and it was an interesting experience.  

Feel free to go back and catch up on any of my better blog posts of the month :)

I love blogging, I wish I could get more readers and followers.  I'm not really sure why.  I blog for myself.  Sometime's it's nice to have people's opinions though.  I've been trying to read other people's blogs more too.  If you would like for me to read your blog please let me know, I always try to leave comments :)  

**.. yoga training ..**

This weekend I attended a YogaFit instructors training course.  I had no idea what to expect and I was kind of nervous.  Our instructor, Shannon, was great.  She was very warm and inviting.  The class started at 8am on Saturday morning, definitely not my thing.  I was exhausted by 10:30 (I was up until 1 the night before studying for my college classes).  So when lunch rolled around at noon we had an hour break and I layed on my mat, on this hard floor and passed out for 30 minutes.  I really needed it.  After class got out last night at 6, we went out to parents to curl since Alex had come home from school and we didn't really get to celebrate dads birthday on friday.  I didn't get home til 1230, homework (for yoga) done by 130 and in bed by 2.  Only to back up at 715.  

In both of the mornings after our introductions and review we had a class session.  I had never actually attended one before.  I had always just followed a Yoga program on television.  Notice the little tea candles on the ground?  She had shut the lights off during relaxation and used those.  It was so neat.  

We got a nice guide and we took turns demonstrating poses.

Yoga blocks, I had never tried one, but my teacher said they are great to use and strongly encouraged.  I tried and it did help with my Half Moon pose.

There were 12 of us that attended this training and quite a few of the girls came with someone they knew.  I was alone, but I feel more comfortable then being with friends (does that make sense?).  I am very nervous to speak in front of people, but I really want to instruct yoga.  I need to get over that fear and this got me started in the right direction.    

All in all it was a great experience, exhausting, but good.  I am glad to have it out of the way.  Once I complete 8 hours of community service by instructing yoga, I will have my teaching certificate.  

**.. curling ..**

Tonight (after day one of yoga training which I will blog about tomorrow) we went out to my parents house.  My sister is home from school and one of my moms sisters, my uncle and their two kids came over to go curling.  

My dad and my brother made a curling 'court/rink' on our pond.

You can see the red rings, of course ours isn't regulation size.  We would NEVER get a game done if it was! 

Since we all couldn't get together til after dark we used lanterns!  My dad has a whole bunch of classic Coleman lanterns and we use them all the time.  We love them! 

That's kind of a better picture.  These were all taken with my phone and my fingers were freezing so I only got a few.  We use milk jugs full of water that have been frozen and I managed to not get any pictures of those :( 

We had a great night and more of a family celebration for my dads birthday :) 

**.. happy birthday ..**

Today my dad turned .. 48!  He's been through a lot in these 48 years.  Today I taught and Jack had school.  After school we went to get cards (I already bought the gift).  Alexandria had a test that lasted until 6:15 so she just got home and my mom had to work til about 9.  While we were at walmart we got dad a cake (but he's on a diet, so he can't eat any).  He's not much of a cake eater anyway.  For me it's all about the candles!  

My brother picked out the cake because he will most likely eat it alone.  It's a Reese's cake.  

After we sang happy birthday, we went out to the pond.  My dad and brother set up a curling area on the ice.  It's pretty darn neat.  We use milk jugs, filled with water and froze.  Each team has 4 jugs (4 are spray painted red to tell whose is whose).  You take turns shooting and the one closest to the "button" scores one.  Of course my hands were frozen so I didn't get any pictures but I will try to get some soon! 

Oh by the way we got my dad a weather gauge, he said it's the only thing he wanted and a massage chair type thing, which he will love.   

**.. 3 things thursday ..**

1)  I LOVE the Jersey Shore and I blame it on my boyfriend.  Tonight's episode was amazing!
2)  I got my hair done today.  Pictures will come in the near future.
3)  I really hope we have a snow day tomorrow!

Short sweet and to the point.

:)

**.. Wednesday Highlights ..**

Today I had to clean a house at 10 am.  I got done around 12.  Went to Target where the cashier was RUDE.  I almost told her she could put all my stuff back, but I had found my dads birthday present.  All he wants it's a remote weather gauge and I found a great one, I think!   I had picked up some snacks for Jason to keep at work and surprised him!  I went and picked him up for lunch and we ate at Panera.  My FAVORITE place to eat!  It was delicous as usual.

I ran home and got my stuff for school.  Went to my two classes for today.  Then I headed out to BINGO!

My dad suggested it this week and I was super excited.  We always decide to split whatever we win.  He hit a $50 pot early on and the second to the last game I hit a $100 pot!  I blogged about our bingo-ing adventures earlier over here.  (Thank you Abra for teaching me how to do this!)

I took my dad home and then called my brother and we called my sister to talk about my dads birthday gifts.  She was going to bed so Jack and I called my grandma.  Had a nice chat.

Now Jason and I are watching some television (scrubs) before bed.

Hope you all had a great Wednesday! :)

**.. animals and meat ..**

We watcehd a video in one of my classes yesterday and I just e-mailed my professor for the link or title of the movie. It's about slaughter houses these days and why they are like that.  If I get it I will share it with you, but this is really bothering me.

Few farmers have control over what they produce and how they produce it. Most of them have been bought out by one of the 4 major meat producers. They feed the cows corn, which cows are not supposed to eat, they are supposed to eat grass. They feed them the corn to get them to grow faster and get them to the slaughter house quicker. The corn has been sprayed with pesticides and all kinds of things to get them to grow more quickly, because of course everything needs to grow super speedy. Since they don't have grass to eat these cows stand in their own and others manure until the meat markets come to pick them up, where they are hung up and washed quickly by workers. NOT ensuring that the animals are fully cleaned of manure and they get it on themselves causing the workers to become contaminated and sick with e-coli or salmonella. 

Meat markets used to be a great job and a great place to work. Now they are dangerous. They keep the assembly line of meat moving so quickly that it is dangerous to work there now. 

A chicken farmer decided to be interviewed for the movie with the risk of losing her job. They keep over 300 chickens in a single house with no room to move. They feed them (something I can't remember off the top of my head) but they give them something to get them to grow quicker than their bodies can handle. It typically takes a chicken 70 days to grow and they can get them BIGGER than that in 49 days. The problem with that is it's not natural and their bodies can't handle it. Their muscles can't develop that quickly so they can only walk a couple steps before falling down. Same as the cows, they walk around in their and others manure then fall and get stuck in there. 

The lady did end up losing her job which she was okay with and was ready to quit anyway.

What caused this problem? Fast food restaurants. And why is America so obese? Because we think we can't live without meat and chicken. Well we can. There is fish (which is WAY more healthy than any other meat), fruits, vegetables, not only can we live on just that, we would all be extremely healthy.

I do eat meat and chicken but I eat it proportionally and we get our meat from local farmers. Yes I am guilty of eating at fast food restaurants, but I do not go everyday nor every week for that matter. 

I know that it would be difficult to keep up with the high demand of meat with no huge slughter houses, but think of all the jobs people could have working for farmers locally. How much more safe their work environments would be and how the risk of salmonella and e-coli would reduce drastically. It's always something to think about.

**.. the bachelor ..**

I used to watch 'The Bachelor' all the time.  The first couple of seasons were okay and I mostly watched them because my mom and my sister did.  When I moved out of my parents house I quit watching it.  This season I finally decided to start watching again, not knowing about Brad being on the show previously.  I watched the first episode and thought that I would really be able to get into it.  Then I missed the past two weeks (?) and finally caught it again tonight.

I now remember why I quit watching this show.  How can these woman fall in love with someone in 3 or 4 weeks, while he is dating 20 other women?!  I do not think it's fair that he sits there and tells them all how great they are and how he wants to be with ALL of them.  How can he be falling for so many women at the same time?!  I could see 2 or 3, but 8 or 9, I just don't understand.

Of course I am now addicted to the show, especially after watching the preview for Las Vegas.  I feel horrible for Emily and I think that she deserves to win.  However I do not feel like Brad deserves her.  I think she deserves an amazing man who is in love with her not 10 other women.

**.. superbowl 2011 ..**

Well as most of you know, I am a BENGALS fan and have been since I was born in 1988, back when they were good!  They have their decent years but for the most part not so much comes out of their season.  Therefore I always have to pick a team or two to cheer for in the playoffs.  I usually choose the Patriots, because they are my brothers favorite team ever.  I also like the Saints.

Well the Bengals didn't make it to the playoffs.
The Saints lost the first week.
The Patriots lost the second week.

So I had to pick another team to root for.

I chose the Bears and they LOST this week!

Now I want the Packers to win over the Steelers, but I'm afraid to say it.

I guess as long as the Colts are out I don't really care.  I have strongly disliked them forever.

So good luck to the Packers, ugh Steelers, I don't know how to go about this?!

**.. tilted kilt ..**

Tonight we went to the Tilted Kilt for a friends birthday dinner.  They just put the first one in our area.  I have heard several different things about this place.

1. The girls all have to try on the uniform at the interview
2. The uniforms are all size small
3. The uniforms stay at the restaurant
4. They dig tattoos and piercings
5. Only young girls work there

Not a whole lot to go off of food wise.  There wasn't a huge menu.  All of their burgers are 10 oz.  That's what I got with cheese, lettuce and tomato.  It was pretty good.  I wanted to try a wrap but they all had weird tortilla sheels, like spinach or jalapeno, not my style.  They have a few entrees and appetizers nothing really jumped out at me though.

Not a great review because it was our first time and there were a lot of people at our table that kept my attention occupied.  It was a good, fun night out.

**.. friday ..**

Today I taught gym for grades k-5.  The kids were all hyped up and going crazy.  Very frustrating for me especially because I almost called in sick today.  I woke up with a sore throat a couple days ago and it won't go away.  But I went.  The older kids played basketball and red light green light for the younger kids.  Finally at 2:50 I was done!

I took Hannah home then Jack and I went home and got the 4-wheeler.  We rode down to the gas station about 1 mile away.  Oh yes we do live in Indiana and it is 9 degrees with the wind chill it felt like negative 5.  We had fun though.

Now I'm sitting at home contmeplating going to see 'No Strings Attached' with Jason.  A couple of my girlfriends asked me to go out tonight, I think I might!

**.. studying ..**

This semester looks like it is going to be pretty tough.  I am not taking any upper level course because my advisor led me down the wrong road, but oh well.  I am taking two sociology classes because I am trying to make that my focus and perhaps a minor as well.  Then two classes on health, behavior and the environment.  I am really interested in health so those classes are okay.  Here's the thing they are all a ton of reading.  Once I get caught up, I am right back behind.  One of my classes has us reading 4 book and writing papers about them, what is that?  The rest are just chapter after chapter and posting comments online consantly to keep up with about 45 other students in 2 of my classes.  It's never ending!  I try not to complain too much becasue I am greatful that I get to go to school, even though I am convinced it is not my thing.

My stack of books minus the one I have to read on the computer.  

**.. dinner ..**

I was looking through pictures and found these from a while back.  Gosh it looks so good if I do say so myself!  My parents started the 17 Day Diet (The Cleanse) on Monday and they are motivating us to start eating healthy again .. not that we have strayed too much, but we could be doing better.  

We haven't had this in a while .. but it is now on the menu for tomorrow night! 

** .. oh cable man .. **

Today we were supposed to get cable installed.  Of course I slept through him knocking on the door and my dog barking.  Which wakes me up nearly EVERY morning.  Jason was mad and I was sad.  We were exited to finally get cable again!  Now they can't come back until Saturday and that window is 8-12 am.  I am definitely not a morning person and Jason has drill.  Bum diggity.

I am going to try to call tomorrow and see if they can come tomorrow or Thursday.  I sure hope so.  I want to watch Giuliana and Bill again!

So please please mister cable man, please come back tomorrow!

Thank you!

** .. a little help .. **

Today Jason went to teach gym with me!  He helped the kids strategize and he would be on a team that needed an extra player.  It was so sweet and pretty cute to  watch.  We had lunch with my brother and my sister came in too for a little bit.  She went back to school this afternoon :(  At the end of the day the principal asked to talk to me and said that if I was going to bring anyone in that they needed to have a criminal background check beforehand.  I apologized.  I didn't realize until last night that he would be helping me because he didn't have to work for MLK day.  I understand her concern however the secretary is the bartneder at a local pub and she knows Jason.  She saw him walk in and it shouldn't have been an issue.  It's not like I am bringing in random crazies.

After school we took Hannah home then took Jack to my parents.  They are on this 17 day diet so we had perch for dinner.  I've never had it, but didn't really care for it.  We also had salad, asparagus and those of us not on the diet had red potatoes.

Then we went to see 'The Dilemma'.  It was pretty good.  I really like Kevin James and Vince Vaugn (? :/).  I won't spoil it for you.

I am getting ready to go out to dinner with my girl friends now.  I'll post tomorrow on how that goes.  I haven't been out in a while!  I'm excited to go!

**.. what do you think ..**

Do you think that you put more on the internet then you talk to your family about?  Or that it is easier to put things on the internet and get others opinions?  If so why or why not?  I would really like to hear your thoughts, feelings and opinions about it.

**.. 55" of greatness ..**

Here is our tv project so far .. I am getting tired and wanted to keep you posted .. as I am sure you are all sitting by your computers waiting to hear what choice we made.  

It's a 55" Insignia.  We were iffy about the brand but Best Buy said it's their brand with LG parts and it was like $600 cheaper and they didn't have the other one in stock.  So we got it.  

First we had to take the other tv down (on the right).

Insane amount of cords ! 

We got it hung up .. only to find out it was too low and the stand wouldn't fit underneath.

So we took it down and fixed it .

Me too ! I couldn't believe I could (help) lift that tv .. it's huge !

When we hung it we found out we lowered it .. OMG we were dying ! I couldn't believe Jason didn't catch on to that .. normally he's all over that kind of stuff.

So we took it down again and fixed it to the correct length ! 

Well it's finally hung at the correct length and Jason is putting everything else together .. the surround sound, the xbox 360, the nintendo (original don't hate), the internet, etc .. and we are getting our cable back on Tuesday ! We are so excited ! 

I will post a better picture when everything is in it's new place.  We totally rearranged everything ! 

**.. LISTEN .. **

Today I taught gym for grades k-5.  It was exhausting.  Since I am so young I know most of these kids pretty well.  I think they feel like they don't have to listen to me because they see me as an older sister, instead of a teacher.  Which does not work to my advantage.  I blow the wistle and they just keep talking and rambling on.  Then each kid asks me what we are doing because no one can hear.  It's ridiculous.

I can give out 'negative minus points' or detentions, but I don't want to.  I want gym to be fun and I want everyone to like me.  BUT I need to be respected and I shouldn't have to yell so much.  Should I start using they punishments to get that respect I deserve?!  I hate to harp on this point but it is important, I volunteer to teach gym here.  They can not afford a gym teacher so I put up with all of this stuff out of the kindness of my heart!  Which only makes it more difficult, because I don't even get paid to deal with this crap!

**.. thankful thursday ..**

My first Thankful Thusday.


I am thankful for a lot of things in my life, my family, boyfriend, friends, job, the opportunity to go to school, having saved enough money to pay off my car when I bought it (NO car payments!), having nice things, having a warm home, the list goes on and on.  I guess this is the opportunity to show our appreciation and gratitude for these things, which I so seldom hear from people.


My facebook status last night was, 
"‎.. it seems like all people do on facebook is complain .. are there any positive/happy people out there ?! .. **"  
Which is not a complaint (I was accoused of that), just a thought.  


I know nearly all of these people as good friends and all they ever do is complain about goinging out and getting drunk and how horrible it ended up being.  The same guys they date and go back to over and over are still screwing them over .. MOVE ON!  They have crappy friends who betray their trust then turn around and tell them the world and their 'friends' do the same thing again. I know it's hard to let people go, but you need to.  (P.S. I am college student, so of course this is all people care about right now.)


Maybe I need to rethink who my friends are?  Do I want to be friends with such negative people that complain all of the time?  I don't go out and drink anymore at all because I'm in a new place in my life.  I want to focus on school, work and making my life better with my boyfriend and family.  I want to be dependable not hungover.  


By no means are things perfect in my life.  I struggle daily with a dad that has a TBI and no answers.  He is in and out of meetings and tests all of the time.  They just found out last week that he may not be able to drive anymore now too.  We don't sit around and wait for answers to show up on our door step, we are taking the necessary actions to move forward.  


There are bigger things to worry about and more people need to realize how good their lives are and be thankful for that.  This is your life.  Things won't be handed to you, but what will you do to make it better?

**..picture time..**

Semi Wordless Wednesday

For my parents 25th anniversary Alexandria, Jack and I went and got pictures taken to blow one up and have it hang in their house. (Something my mom had really been talking about.)  Their anniversary was August 23rd and we got these done a couple days before.  We chose the second one to be the lucky one!  The rest were put into a video slide show also for their anniversary :) They were so surprised and very happy with both!  Oh by the way we took over 250 pictures! It was crazy and my sister had been diagnosed with mono earlier that day :/ She is such a trooper! 

I love my brother and sister so much ! 

**.. bring on the snow ..**

It has been snowing all day and I love it.

As long as it stays and doesn't melt away tomorrow.  I wish that it would snow all night and all day tomorrow and so on.  We haven't had a really good snow in years.  I want college classes to be cancelled (which I have never had), I want school delays and closings for the school I teach at, and I want to be snowed in for a couple days too.

Is that too much to ask!?

If we have to suffer through these freezing temeratures for 4-7 months out of the year, I would like to have a really GREAT snow at some point.  Something that will be remembered like the blizzard of '78.

Is it really too much to ask for ?!

By the way this is why I plan on moving to the south at some point in my future.  I don't want to have this hatred for cold weather and be stuck living here forever.

What I really WANT is 75 - 85 degree weather all year!

** .. yes or no (to a tv) .. **

Jason has been dying to get a smaller television for our bedroom for months.  We finally went to Best Buy tonight to look at tv's tonight.  While we were looking someone came up to help us of course and Jason said he wanted a 50" tv.  Our tv now is 40", to me that seems like a bigger tv.  Did I miss something?

Then of course the lady helping us suggested a 55" LCD for $899.  I don't know about you but I am a full time college student who is hardly comfortable with my living situation.  A $899 television is not in my budget right now.  On top of that I don't think that 2 tv's is necessary at this point in time.

Now if he wants to buy it on his own should he just do it?  Even though I am patiently waiting on a ring, that he swears won't be affected by this purchase.

**..flash forawrd (presently)..**

In 2 years quite a bit has changed.

I still go to IPFW but my major is now General Studies and I love it.  I have taken a wide variety of classes but I enjoy the nutrition classes the most!  My new goal is to go into Yoga after college and open my own studio.

I still work at the same place and I still clean one house.  I really want to quit cleaning the house though it is a mind numbing job that I just do not care to do anymore.  The money is great but I dread doing it.  I also teach gym as I have talked about before.

My sister now goes to IU and studies nursing.  Jack is in the 7th grade and he is playing football and basketball.

Jason and I have went ring shopping and have spoken about getting engaged but who knows when it will happen?  I want it to be a surprise!  I can't see myself with anyone else, we have been through a ton of stuff and I'm sure there is a ton more to come.  We can do it though!

I go back to school tomorrow.  I just want to be done!

** .. fashback (old school) .. **

I began blogging in April of 2009.  This was my first blog post EVER!  I will post tomorrow night about what has changed in the past 2 years!  I would like to incorporate old posts into my new blog because I don't know how to do it automatically and I have some good stuff from the old days.  I hope you enjoy it :) 
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 15, 2009

My First Blog ..

Today is the big day ! After several weeks of reading my aunt's blog, I have decided to join as well. So, forgive me, because it will most likely take me awhile to get the hang of this. Hopefully it will be sooner than later though :)

I currently attend IPFW University, for Business .. not sure which direction yet .. but I am working on figuring it out ! I work as a waitress at Nine Mile Restaurant and I clean a couple houses to help bring the money in :) I live on the Northwest side of Fort Wayne, so it is quite a drive, to wherever I want to go .. except Wal - Mart .. which is just two minutes away .. yay !

I recently got really into yoga and I love it ! It is an amazing relaxer and completely helps me to get my mind off of everything. Other then yoga, I just study, clean, and hang out with my friends. I also enjoy crocheting .. which my grandma taught me how to do at the age of 7 .. I am working on a blanket for my bed and am about 1/3 of the way done :)

I have one sister and one brother.

Alex will be 18 in June .. so for mother's day, we are going to take my mom gambling at Soaring Eagle .. can't wait ! Alex and I are pretty close and talk to each other fairly often, I wish we were a little closer though .. but I hear that comes with time .. hopefully :)

Jack turned 11 in December and just got done playing basketball and will now start with baseball .. which I love and he is now in majors .. which hopefully means more competition and excitement ! I really enjoy going out to watch him participate in sporting or school events. We talk to one another nearly everyday .. that way we can stay close . since I no longer live at home .

I recently lost my grandpa Jim .. and have a more difficult time accepting it .. then I ever imagined that I would .. but as with everything, it will just take time .

That's all I have got for now ..

** .. it's friday .. **

Since my post yesterday was quite lengthy I opted for a short one today.

I taught gym today and came across the idea of becoming a substitute teacher!  I hear you only have to have a year or two of college done and I do.  I came home and got on the diocesan website for our area and they are currently only taking people with an education degree or a teaching license. (bummer)  I might try to apply anyway, because I know the school I teach at would call me if they needed someone.

Are you a substitue teacher?  Have you ever been a substitute teacher?  What are your thoughts, feelings and opinions on the matter?

Tonight we are having a surprise 74th (not 70 or 75 but 74. No time like the present I guess. lol) birthday party for my grandpa Harry.

That's all I have for today and if you are feeling like reading more please please read the post about my grandma Ruth that I wrote yesterday.  It was hard to write and took me 5 years to do.  (Not literally just 5 years to have the courage to do it.)

.Peace and Love.

** .. it's been 5 years today .. **

In 1998, I was in the fourth grade.  I had been at a girl scout meeting after school, my dad came and picked me up and said that my mom had something to tell me when I got home.  I went straight to my room to start working on my homework and wait for her to come talk to me.  I remember I was sitting in one of those blue inflatable chairs when my mom came in.  She asked me about my day then said, "Kaitlin, do you know what cancer is?"  It caught me off guard but I drudged through an answer and she said, "Yes, that is correct.  They think that grandma Ruth has colon cancer."  I immediately started to cry and assumed that my grandma was dying that week.  We talked a little bit more and she told me not to talk about it at school because my other cousins might not know and it just wasn't something they wanted going around so quickly.  (My grandma didn't like for people to talk about her.  She pretty much kept to herself.)

She went through chemotherapy and radiation and treatments and all kinds of other things.  Tons and tons of appointments and meetings.  It was just never ending.  The next couple years are hazy as far as doctor's appointments and treatments.  I know she beat the cancer at least once, maybe twice.  As soon as she beat it another form would come on and it would be worse than the first time.  She lost her hair and wore wigs, but remained beautiful through it all. 

In the Fall of 2005 my grandma got pretty bad.  We decided to get a family picture taken.  I don't have a copy on my computer, but it was gorgeous.  There was my grandma and grandpa, all 6 kids and thier spouses, and all 22 grandchildren and 1 great grand child.  We all wore jeans and white shirts it was so neat!  November 7th grandma turned 68 and her kids and their spouses threw a surprise birthday party dinner for her in THEIR basement, becasue she couldn't really get out.  They had food catered in and I heard it was just awesome.  

By this time all she wanted was to make it through the holidays and she did just that.  On Christmas Eve she sat in her chair with swollen ankles and patchy hair and she watched us open gifts, then opened her own and we all sat around and hung out.  She was happy but in pain and everyone could tell.  Around NewYear's she started to get really bad.  We all took turns going to visit her individually and to say good bye.  

I was 17 years old and had never lost anyone close to me before.  I was afraid to go over there alone (not because she was a scary person .. I was afraid of losing her).  I asked my brother who was 8 to come with me.  Before we left to go over there,

Jack asked my dad, "What do I say to her?" 

Dad said, "She is your grandma, just say what ever comes to your mind.  You can begin with, "Grandma I know you are sick and the cancer is taking over your body.  You are going to a better place soon and I will miss you."  

Jack said okay and we got in my '97 red cavalier and made the 2 minute drive to my grandparents house.    We got there and everyone was gone, as we had planend out when people could have their alone time.  We walked in through the garage and into the living room.  

She was sitting in her rocking chair all alone.  I didn't get the door shut and I was crying like a baby.  I stood by the door and turned around.  She said "Oh Kaiti, it's okay, come in here."  

Jack went straight over to her, stood by her chair and said, "Grandma I know you are sick and the cancer is taking over your body.  You are going to a better place soon and I will miss you." (Exactly what dad said)  It was quite possibly one of the saddest momements of my life.  

She responded with something sweet, I can't remember because I was too busy crying.  Then she said to me, "Kaiti look at it outside, it's rainy and gloomy and the sun hasn't been out for days.  I am ready to go.  I know that I am going to a better place and I am ready for that.  I'm sick and tired and ready to go."  I just sat there and cried and cried.  I went on about how unfair it was that it was her time.  She was too young to die (68) and to have been through all of this crap.  

She was ready though, her time here was complete.   She had impacted people's lives in incredible ways.  She was a wise, strong woman, who worked hard her whole life, she was married for 48 years, had 6 wonderful kids all married to wonderful people, with 22 grandchildren and 1 great grand child.  She was thrilled with all she had been given.  

We sat there for an hour or so and watched football (the Bengals).  We left and I gave my grandma a hug and kiss goodbye (which we typically did not do, that's just how that side of the family works).  The next couple of days I skipped my intership to spend the afternoons at their house with family and friends.  At some point during the week she was moved to a hospital bed in a bedroom (she didn't want to be in the living room for everyone to see her).  

On Friday afternoon I went there straight after school and so did Alex.  Alex was leaving for Florida in an hour and wanted to say goodbye.  My dad brought her over and they left and my mom had just left to go to work.  Jessica (my cousin) and I were sitting in her room reminiscing when grandma started to breath very slow, deep breaths.  Jessica said the hospice nurse mentioned that when she was breathing like that it meant the end was near.  So we got up and went into the living room where Jessica's mom, two sisters and my grandpa were.  She said something to my aunt and we all went back there and in those 2 minutes she had gone to Heaven.  

It's been 5 years today.  Not a day goes by that I don't think about this wonderful woman.  Grandma Ruth, you were truly an inspiration and I would give anything to be the woman you were.  I love you.

My mom, my great grandma, my grandma Ruth and me.

(not a great picture but 4 genertaions!)

** .. b . i . n . g . o .. **

For the past year or so I have been playing bingo occasionally Wednesday nights at a local Legion.  Sometimes my dad or sister go with me and  every once in a while my mom and Austin (Alex's boyfriend goes too).  Jason normally doesn't go because he has to work and that kind of gives us some time alone too.

They hold this Bingo tournament every Wednesday with the Early Bird tournament starting at 6.  We always get there around 5:45 to sit together.  There are about 24 different games and it takes nearly 4 hours to get through all of them with a couple intermissions and prize give aways.  Each game is worth $50 - $100 and it costs $25 to play ($20 for newbies).  The final coverall game is worth about $650 each week.

Usually when we go we agree to split what we make to increase our odds.  Tonight me and dad agreed to share our winnings and Alex and Austin agreed to share their winnings.  Well Alex hit a $50 pot early on and that was it for our luck tonight.  There were 70 people there tonight which is quite a bit for this little place.  We had a good time though and I got to spend time with my sister and her boyfriend before they go back to college for the Spring Semester.  I always miss them when they go.

I also always try to get my dad to come with me because I think that it is good for him, since he has the TBI.  He struggles sometimes but I like to think that it helps and it gives us some time together.

So for all of you who always wonder about my bingo adventures, there it is!

** .. wedding planner .. **

Last night at work I was talking to my girlfirend about her wedding in August of this year.  She has not picked out the invitations, save the dates, the menu, the decorations, the photographer, they have not had their engagement pictures taken and the list goes on.

I said, "Sam, why don't you let me help you out?"  She did not hesitate and said "Okay".

Well now I am kind of nervous!

I woke up today though and started in.  I have found a few save the date magnets and invitations similar to what she described.  She has chosen a florist and has an idea of the photographer but has not contacted him and I can't find him online :/ They booked the band and I believe the church and the venue.  So that helps quite a bit!

I took an event planning class this last semester and got an A!  Therefore I am pretty excited to see what I can do and hopefully she likes my ideas!  If you have any advice or suggestions please feel free to let me know.  Any and all help is greatly appreciated!

** .. 13 hour work day .. **

Well today I went back to teaching gym.  My first class was 2nd and 3rd grades, I thoguht that it was best to begin with going over the rules and it was.  They still didn't listen, shocking.  Then I had 6th grade, same thing different time.  For lunch we had chicken tenders, french fries, mixed vegetables, appricots, applesauce and chocolate milk .. yummmm!  (I am a sucker for school lunch!)  Then my dad and my sister came up to help me out with a basketball tournament for 7th and 8th grade, my sister reffed and my dad kept score, it was nice to have help!  One kid asked me why I was so much nicer when my dad and sister were there, I responded with, "because you actually listen when other people are here."  I am NOT even mean to these kids and I certainly don't make enough (aka nothing) to deal with their crap!  But I won't lie it really hurt my feelings to hear that, I feel like I do a really good job.  Especially for having no experience with teaching.  Next up was 4th and 5th grades and then I finished the day by teaching Kindergarten and 1st grades.

Ran to my parents house, dropped my brother off, talked to my family for about 20 minutes, got ready and went to bartend for the evening.  We weren't very busy.  I only made $50 in tips, but I do make $8 an hour so it was too bad.  Got out of there a little after 11 and just got home!

That concludes my 13 hour work day.  I BARELY made it home in time to blog for today but I am glad that I did!  I am really enjoying this for the 3rd day in a row!

** .. new years resolution .. **

I decided last night that one of my new year's resolutions for 2011 would be to blog more frequently.  Blogging for me is like a journal, where I write quite a bit at once then let it go for a while, then come back and write another big post to catch up, and no one likes that.  It's a pain to read and even to write.  Therefore I would like to better my blog and allow my readers to follow my journey through life one day at a time, instead of weeks or months at a time.  I am very excited and hope that I can manage to keep up with it!

Tonight I waited tables.  I made about $70, which isn't too bad for 5 1/2 hours of work.  All of my customers were polite, which helps a ton!

I have waited on this particular group of 6 since I began working here, about 6 or 7 years ago, nearly every Sunday night.  It is 2 couples and 2 other ladies, all of the 4 ladies are sisters and the one couple Moe and Marlene were close friends to my Granda Jim and Grandma Ruth.  Anyway, tonight 5 of them came in, minus one husband and I asked where he was?  They looked at me and looked down, finally Moe said that he had passed away.  (I have been on vacation and had family Christmas's the past few Sundays so I haven't been around recently, I obviously hadn't heard).  I felt horrible and the wife looked like she was going to cry and I apologized.  I have never felt so bad in my life.  They could not have been any better about it though and I am extremely grateful!

Other than that it was a great night, I brought home chicken gizzards and wings to share with my brother.  Everyone else was in bed, they went gambling today!  I am staying at parents house tonight because I go back to my gym teaching tomorrow.  Hopefully the kids aren't too crazy from Christmas Break!

** .. new year's day 2011 .. **

Today we decided to go bowling for New Year's Day ! 

Me and Jack (I bought him this sweet shirt on Spring Break) ! 

First game scores .

My sister, her boyfriend and my mom were on a team.

Jason, me and Jack were on the other team .

We got the first game ! 

Austin (Alex's boyfriend) and my momma .

Alexandria

Second game scores . Jack started to work on spinning the ball .. didn't work out for the best ! 

Alex, Austin and Mom got this one ! 

Me and Jason :) 

Alexandria and Austin :) 

Thrird game scores .

They got this one too ! 

We had a great time bowling today and other than Jack working on his spinning game .. we did pretty good for only bowling a couple times a year :)